As Luke tells the Biblical story, Martha
invited Jesus Christ into her house; but while she was “distracted with much
serving”—bustling to serve food and drink to their visitor, Martha’s sister,
Mary, “sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to his teaching.” This rankled Martha—she had invited Christ
and was doing the hard work of being his hostess—but Mary was the one who could
glow in his company. Jealous of Mary,
she went to Christ to complain: “Lord, do you not care that my sister has left
me to serve alone? Tell her then to help
me.” Clearly, Martha was not getting “it.” Patiently, Christ answered her, “Martha,
Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things; one thing is
needful. Mary has chosen the good
portion, which shall not be taken away from her” (Luke: 10:38-42).
I was Martha on the night I invited
a dear friend to speak to my Emily Dickinson class. On the desk, I placed a vase full of white
flowers as a gift to her, and as a way to brighten our classroom for her visit.
For half an hour before she started her presentation, I distributed and coached
my students through filling out 10-page sheaves of university release forms for
a tour of Amherst on which I was hoping to take us. On collecting those, I distributed
copies of former students’ Dickinson papers to inspire their own. Told them we
would workshop next time and when their papers were due. I resented the bureaucrazies
I had to orchestrate and having to play the disciplinarian mother. My friend waited patiently. At last she was able to start a presentation.
She was, as always, luminous. Without a teacher’s agenda, she was able to share
her personal connection to Dickinson and to open the discussion to whatever
direction it wanted to take. I loved her
presentation—her passion, range of feeling, wisdom, and her own poetry. I loved how freely the students engaged with
her and with each other. And yes, I know that my being Mary with them most of
the time, eased the way. But I am most grateful for her presentation because this
time she inspired me to reflect on how administrative structures—pitched to
assessment, filling out forms, student retention, and what I address as “the
litterbox theory of education: coverage and control”—how these pressure me into being more of a Martha than I
care to be.
In my posts, I am fierce for helping
students recover their love of reading, their innate capacities for original
thought, their freedom from draconian educational practices. I am devoted to teaching students, not
subject—to focusing on awakening, not the stupor of the conventional pedagogical
grind. But focused on them, I was not paying sufficient attention to what I
have lost, in over 40 years of teaching in institutions. To liberate myself, I
know, is to model that to students—the most potent do-as-I-do way of teaching.
In my next class, a Shakespeare
Survey the following morning, I went Mary—enjoying “the good portion.” We chatted—not discussed—the school
production of A Midsummer Night’s Dream,
which we had all seen. I did not steer how
the conversation went, but occasionally participated in it. I could feel the Martha coming up in me—remind them of Fallon’s aspects of staging;
make sure to reference the text for changes in language…and stopped
myself. This was not about me. I also
avoided responding to every comment a student made—the having the last word that co-opts most student comments in classes—stealing
their proverbial thunder. I let myself enjoy their pleasure in the performances
and in how well they remembered details and amplified each other’s insights. I let them have themselves.
Martha is about housekeeping. If we riff on Velázquez’s painting “Christ in
the House of Martha and Mary,” we can see that Martha, in the foreground, is literally
grinding away at chores. In front of her
are fish and eggs—symbolic of the sperm and ova that represent conception and
child-bearing. An old woman hovers over her, pointing a judgmental finger of
gender. Like the garlic and hot pepper,
Martha’s life stinks and bites right now—and she’s scowling. Her hair is covered, and her brows furrowed. In a world that prefers right dominance, she is thrown to the left side of the canvas.
The only exit from this prison is the
pass-through (for it isn’t even a door through which Martha might walk). We can see Mary, in the distance, her hair symbolically down. She’s enjoying
the presence of the treasured guest, who is not only paying attention to her,
but blessing her. She is swaddled in a golden shawl. She is, literally, in the right.
I’m rethinking the assignments for all
my classes. Time to give Martha a break—enough housekeeping, coverage, and
control. I’m naming the Martha teacher
game, first—vigilant moves such as scolding of any kind, micromanaging checklists
for discussions and group work, quizzes, spoon-feeding students, emphasizing
being right, having to have students agree—all those things that speak of STOP.
I want to be in the living room to
enjoy the good portion—to be homies, the favorite aunt who can spoil her nieces
and nephews, instead. I’m kick-starting the assignments for my courses to
foreground what matters—the less assessible the assignment, the better. The less about testing whether students
remember what they’re supposed to remember—the more about what they do find
memorable. Toss out the rubrics, bring
in light and air—meaningful engagement with literature and writing. To riff on
an adage—“Let go and let Good.”
In The Nag Hammadi Library, the gospels that didn’t make the cut into
the synoptic Bible, Christ says in “The Gospel of Thomas”: “Do not tell lies,
and do not do what you hate” (6). Try being a part of an institution and live by
that! Eek! But that’s a blog
for another day.
Just saying: We are fortunate that Dickinson left
school before her Martha could take over.
I had originally ended this post asking "How are your teachers more Martha than
Mary?" But Sara Faulkner, in her reply below, cogently argued that it was a leading question~very Martha, indeed. So I am rephrasing the question, as Sara suggests, to this: Are your teachers Martha or Mary? (Make that an inclusive "or," which means that they can be both Martha and Mary.) In what specific ways? What’s the balance of Martha and Mary in you? How do we recover?
Works Cited
Cover Art: Velázquez, Diego. “Kitchen scene with Christ
in the house of Martha and
Mary,” 1618.
Luke: 10:38-42
“The Gospel of Thomas.” The Nag
Hammadi Library. New York: Harper, 1978.
This is both cautionary tale and inspiration for me--I have been teaching for almost 60 years and have been Martha too often, believing that if I did not guide the discussion in a literature class along predetermined lines, the class would go soft, not come to intelligent conclusions. However, in writing classes, it has been students who have helped me be Mary and listen more, then participate or guide when students asked me to. Last semester I asked, after students had been working in small groups for about twenty minutes, whether this would be a good time to stop and review. The student who said "No" gave us all a gift and I thanked her, enjoying the illumination of realizing that they were getting exactly what they needed at that moment and I belonged on the sidelines, learning, not teaching. Let us all be merry Mary and give Martha a rest.
ReplyDeleteAs you may know, most professors are like Martha; micro-managers, to-the-script and they lack personal touch in their lesson plans. I can tell that some teachers have become bored with themselves as their eyes look passed the students and their voice goes monotone. These teachers become robots, routinely coming to class to read pages full of instructions from philosophers from the Stone Age! “Remember this and do it the exact same way!”-Martha. I have had my share of tiresome teachers that are like Martha but the light shining from the teachers that are free-thinking, as Mary would be, inspired me to become a teacher that makes learning an experience rather than a requirement. All of the teachers I met with Mary’s style had one major thing in common, they weren’t afraid to be themselves with their students. Of course, there is a way to behave amongst students and in the workplace, but that doesn’t mean you have to brainwash yourself the moment you clock in. Learning is a lot less debilitating when the instructor is comfortable amongst their students.
ReplyDeleteLately, I have been working on finding the right balance of Martha and Mary in my personal life. By nature, I am Mary, I live for the enjoyable moments of life; always laughing, joking, singing, even attending events solely because ‘why not?’. College has undeniably forced me to tap into Martha as I will take days to buckle down to do only assignments, readings and study for exams. Usually during the last few weeks of school I will go full throttle Martha with no breaks to see the sun, but I always have the finish line to look forward to.
Dear Dr. Rich,
ReplyDeleteI was very curious of the painting you described so I looked it up on google images. I find it very
interesting that Diego VELÁZQUEZ minimized Christ, Mary, and an older woman while maximizing Martha and an older woman’s misery and mistake. I am also very interested in why VELÁZQUEZ added the two older women behind both Martha and Mary because I do not think they are needed. I do see the two older women emphasizes the point that Martha is being harshly controlled and scolded into doing what she thinks is write while Mary is being lovingly guided by the older women with a light hand to the top of Mary’s head. I also see that Martha has become so consumed with what she thinks she is supposed to be doing that she is missing out on enjoying the monument. I feel like this happens to a lot of my professors who feel like they have failed if they do not get through all the material and the class is not all on the same page on what a text ‘means’. I have two professors this semester that care about my own opinion and four classes where my opinion must be in line with what the professor gets from the text. I have one class where the entire class in open discussion, but it is far from freeing because we are forced to start the discussion on what we understood from the text and this information needs to align with what the professor thinks. This creates more pressure then enjoyment. I have one class which is really putting me over the edge because the professor is not only a Martha but she is also the old women behind Martha that rules her class with fear and belittling of students that have contradictory opinions. I will just leave it at that because if I go any further I will just every emotional.
Kathleen Conaty
Kathy, As always, you have a Brilliant take on whatever the topic. Thank you for your insights and mindfulness ♡
DeleteDr. Rich,
ReplyDeleteWhile reading this blog post, I had no idea that you felt more like Martha while conducting our Emily Dickinson class. I personally did not notice, I believe that the group work and discussion that we engage in during class is very informative and I feel like I learn a lot about Dickinson. Although, I am also excited for what is in store for our next class meeting. As mentioned in the blog, I am eager to see and learn from the ways in which you, Dr. Rich, will conduct “meaningful engagement with literature and writing” because it is something that I also believe in.
To be honest, I feel that I am more of a Martha than a Mary. I would like to think I am a healthy balance of both. Although, I have a little sister and with me being the older sister, I was expected to undertake the role of “control” by my parents. In terms of being a student, I believe that I am more of a Mary. I prefer being involved in a discussion with my fellow peers rather than being lectured about a topic. In my Children’s Literature class, my professor has a very good habit of expanding on a topic that was presented by a student. She gives a personal experience from her life which in return allows another student to give a personal experience from theirs. Recently, I have noticed that I have actually participated in the class discussion about the novels that we were assigned to read (which is something that I rarely do because of my fear of public speaking).
The professor in this class uses a method of teaching which I have seldom seen from other classes which is to embody Mary. She relates the text to herself without giving tangents about her kids or riffing on one of her past “bad” students. She makes it amusing and most of all opens the classroom like it is a forum. This professor does not turn her nose up at her students and does not play into the authoritative role that I have seen my previous professors do. I feel that I actually learn more from this method, rather than sitting for two hours and listening to a professor talk about a topic I have no knowledge about. This is true because this happened to me in one of the History courses I was required to take. Most of the students ended up with a satisfactory grade because the professor would assign readings where the chapters were so long and that no one did because he covered them in his PowerPoint slides. Then, he would lecture for two hours and half hours straight without asking any questions towards students. To make matters worse, he would require three research papers with little to no guidance on how to do them. I believe this is what an extreme Martha would look like and it is the type of teacher I would never want to be.
I have had my fair share of professors that use the Martha method to teach. However, the courses where I learned from the most included professors that were more like Mary. Therefore, I feel like there is this unspoken understanding among students about professors regarding this concept and it certainly influences us when it comes time to choose courses.
-Alison S.
Dr. Rich I agree with this post that teachers who show enthusiasm for what they are teaching are more memorable than those teachers who seem to be so miserable. I remember in Kindergarten I had a teacher named Ms. Miller. She was so enthusiastic about teaching that it shown through her teaching. She was an older lady but full of energy and very outgoing. I admired her so much that I wanted to become a children’s teacher just like her when I grew up. I also believe that teachers who show passion for the subject they are teaching, allows students to feel at ease and comfortable in that subject and also allow them to do better in it. Growing up I always hated math because I found it too complicating. I remember my math teacher from when I first began college, her name was Ms. Boyd. Ms. Boyd made math seem so easy, she broke down every little step and always made sure none of her students were falling behind or were confused. When I began the class I wasn’t doing well at all in any of my assignments, and she immediately knew what she had to do to help me. She meet with me during her breaks, so while she was eating her salas she was also helping me solve some equations. Later on through the semester I started to do better I turn my Fs into Cs and by the end of the semester those Cs became As. I was so proud of myself and couldn’t have done it without Ms. Boyd and her passion for teaching math. I have had a few terrible teachers that did things like embarrassed students in front of the entire class and constantly yells at students for no reason at all. I can not remember the names of these teachers nor the subject they taught but I remember dreading to go to their classes. I hope to be that teacher that will be memorable to her students some day.
ReplyDelete-Debby A.
While reading this post I thought about this quote, “When you die, what legacy will you leave behind”? I asked myself the same question and I hope that people would remember me by how I treated those around me. How I loved those that were difficult to understand. I believe that every teacher should ask themselves that question. Growing up, I had an amazing English Professor that put the time and hard work into making sure that all her students were on track. I mean, she would come in early if any student felt that they were running out of ideas. She would bring several different books in to provide us with new incites for our writing. She was also a published writer and an activist. I remember her by her dedication and passion to help all her students become better writers. Six years later, I am still contacting her for writing advice and a list of books to read every summer.
ReplyDeleteI love the story of Martha and Mary because I believe that we can all learn or take away something from that passage of scripture. Dr. Rich says “Time to give Martha a break enough housekeeping, coverage and control”. Sometimes Martha needs a break to focus on what’s important and the memories that will be a part of her legacy that will be left behind when she leaves.
- Jasmin H.
Seanette Martin
ReplyDeleteMarch 12, 2019
Blog 7
Martha and Mary in the Classroom
This blog fits my current mood with this semester how ironic is that? Many of my professors claim to be more like Mary but as the weeks unfold you notice they are indeed Martha. They stress how your writing should be your own and they are only here to coach but when it’s all said and done the writing is no longer yours it's really theirs. You try to write how to feel and they would rather you make it to their liking and no longer be true to yourself. This teaches me that once I become a teacher I know I would rather be like Mary. I want my children to enjoy writing and being themselves. I don’t want to take away the joy of writing from my students but in fact I would rather them enjoy their writing. I would try to understand where they are coming from, even put myself in their shoes and see what I can do to help them shape the writing without turning it into exactly what I want it to be. If I state they will have freedom of writing what they would like to write then I will keep it that way not change my thought process in the middle of the semester.
Many professor try to make school a prison in a sense do this do that I want it like this I want it like that. That tends to make students do the work just to get it done there is no longer passion in the writing. The writing just becomes a generic copy of what the professor wants. I honestly thought this was finally my semester of freedom writing doing what I love but it turned out to be the same Martha’s that I have encountered throughout the journey. This semester began with excitement for writing with so much passion but now the passion is gone just focused on getting it done.
Now that I think about it, my teachers vary between being Martha and Mary. I have some professors that are exactly like Martha. We follow a routine, which consists of sitting down, taking out notebooks, and listening to them speak for exactly two and a half hours. Those professors like to get straight to the point, without giving students time to speak. They want their students to get all the information down, while being bland about it. Not sharing experiences, fun facts, or outside information. Just strictly textbook examples and facts. If there is ever a time that those “Martha” teachers, act like “Mary,” it’s typically when you are speaking to them one-on-one.
ReplyDeleteI do have some professors that are more like Mary. They let the students basically teach the class. By that, I mean the professor sends us home to read the next chapter, we then regroup in class, and discuss what we read and what we learned from the reading. It allows our professor to hear what other student’s have retained from the chapter, and how students understand it differently than how she would teach it.
Then, I have professors who are a little bit of both. We have a routine, yet the professors will be like Mary, while letting us group up and discuss with some group activities. I think there is a happy balance when professors are both Mary and Martha. It is great to have a routine, and to make sure that the students are learning everything they need to know. Then, it is also great to allow them to speak, while the teacher doesn’t have too for once. I feel as if I am Martha when it comes to school because I like to be stern with myself and get everything done properly. I really enjoyed learning about Martha and Mary, as it has given me a greater insight on how teachers teach!
Forgive me for saying so, but the very essence of the question, “How are your teachers more Martha than Mary?” seems like a very “Martha” question to me. This question directs students to answer in one direction, “More Martha than Mary.” To me this question asks, “How are your teachers doing exactly what I say that they do?” In a courtroom this question would be labeled as “leading.” The question would be better asked, “Are your teachers more Martha or Mary?” This question allows students more freedom to compare their teachers, instead of looking for something that may not be there.
ReplyDeleteI would say that, for the most part, I have had more Marys than Marthas in my higher education - professors that allow students to have creative freedom over their work. They give parameters for the assignment, such as, “write a poem,” or “write a research paper.” Students are generally allowed to choose their own topic, to make sure it is something they are interested in writing. Peer reviews workshops help to fine-tune drafts into final papers. The professor does not participate in editing, aside from answering specific questions about particular parts of a paper. They do not micromanage the editing process except for repeating the one direction students have heard every year since elementary school: be sure to give positive, constructive feedback.
In my own classroom, I certainly hope to be a Mary, to allow my students the creative freedom to truly explore themselves as writers. With young children I will focus on correcting one writing structure at a time, in order to avoid overwhelming them with grammatical rules that will make them give it all up. Students will tell me all the time that they hate writing, but I tell them that it’s likely because they don’t get to write what they want. In my classroom I hope to change that by having children write whatever they want, as often as possible.
~ Sara Faulkner
Dr. Rich,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed the discussion of Martha vs. Mary in our class on Friday. I find that more often then not my teachers tend to be more of a Martha. I noticed this based on their structure and unfortunately sometimes loss of passion. Your class is one of my most enjoyed classes, you have a little bit of Martha but mostly Mary. You truly love what you do, you are happy when we can discuss the topic's necessary to whatever extent and measure we need. Where as in some classes if you do not answer the question exactly as "Martha" wants then you are incorrect. I really hope that when I am a teacher one day I leave Martha aside and express as a Mary. I feel it is so crucial to younger children especially to really express themselves and focus on what they saw and how they interpreted it as opposed to searching for the correct answer.
Kelly Fleschner
Teachers can...and should be..Martha and Mary. Utilizing the right at the right time approach is key.
ReplyDeleteSince we're quoting scripture, Jesus pointed to that " a few things are needed, or just one." Writers, need structure. Writers need grammar tips. Writers need assistance with descriptive language. Writers need coaching. Unfortunately, some teachers are "Marthas" only.
Mary certainly "chose the good portion." Instead of worrying about details, she sat and listened to the wisdom from Jesus. Martha is concerned about the details. I've had teachers who focus was grammar, word usage, etc..When my teachers took the " Martha" approach, my focus was, not on learning and creativity, but details such as gramnmar, word usage, etc..
Not to bash teachers who take the "Martha" approach when working with students. That approach has its place in writing too. Jesus said in verse 42, " a few things, though, are needed, or just one." Not dismissing Martha's efforts, Jesus noted that some things were needed for his visit. We need that "Martha" approach. Writers need structure, correct grammar usage etc,: all these things are vital to setting the tone in the writing piece. If teachers stopped focusing on these points altogether, writers would lack the skills to use words and sentences to convey their messages.
Striking a balance is key. If I had to say what the balance should be, the “Mary “ approach would be 65%. Creativity should be main focus, while packing the creativity in a format that is understandable and entertaining is is important too. Not equally important, yet still important.
As teachers, we have to listen, like Mary, and perform some prep work, like Martha.
Discussing the focus of our brains in terms of Martha and Mary is very significant and relevant to me. Not only just because I am a Christian and enjoy the bible stories, but also because I often find my mind relating to both sisters quite often. The time I most often find myself switching between the two sisters are at school.
ReplyDeleteOut of all of my siblings (being the middle one of five) I would say I am the most creative child. At home I am often singing songs, drawing/painting/taking pictures, or playing the piano. It is really natural for me to be like Mary when it comes to these activities and not really care how it turns out or if I mess up a little bit. Cause I know I can do it again and that overall doing it makes me happy. I get the similar feeling when I can do my creative writing and just write/type whatever comes to mind.
Unfortunately, this is not the same when it comes to school. Whenever I’m at school I find more difficult to let the Mary side of me shine through, especially when I’m in class. I tend to be like Martha when it comes to my school work. I am not sure if it is because of my teachers in high school and the way I was taught growing, but I often find myself being Martha when I am working on a paper for school. I am constantly stressing about what needs to get done, how it should be done, and if it is good enough when it is done.
In some ways this is good because the Martha in mean makes me more productive and helps me do my best work. However, it does get to a point where, like Martha, I get so stressed out that I start to question my ability to get it done. Thankfully, however, I eventually remember Him and what did in the Gospel of Luke. In doing so I am able to calm down more and to remember that through Him all things are possible (and that the work is not bigger than me).
“Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” - Luke 10: 41-42
-Anna Lee
I am conflicted between the two worlds of Mary and Martha.In a typical classroom setting I am inclined to get a sense of who my professor is and then I lean more to either one.In both roles I am often in tuned to what is the topic of discussion and either listen or make myself busy as Martha.
ReplyDeleteI am often overwhelmed with work,household duties and parenting at times I want to take a break and find it almost impossible to do so.I need to adapt Mary's principle of knowing when it is time to sit and listen and have someone else do the talking or work.While this may seem unfair to Martha she did not see the importance of slowing down or changing course.
It is important to note also that taking a break from the everyday roles of life is 'OK'. Having someone else take the center stage for a while brings new life and energy.
Tina Gordon
ReplyDeleteMartha and Mary in the classroom: House vs. Home
This blog post relates to some professors who at first claim to be Mary and during the semester they are Martha. They make you feel that you have control over what you do but after they would make you do what they wanted you to do. This sometimes makes me feel frustrated because I have in the back of my head of having control over my work, and having the free will to write what I want to write about. Having professors like that do not understand how to teach because they give you the impression of one thing and doing a different thing.
Sometimes being in classes with professor like that, I feel clueless about what is needed because I cannot say and write what I want to write about. I would try to make everything seems real when it is fake because it’s not coming directly from my heart to write what is exactly on my mind or what I feel about it. I am only doing it because I want to please the professor or to reach their expectations.
Dr. Rich,
ReplyDeleteThank you, thank you, thank you! Wow, this is a very meaningful, yet modern post. I appreciate the reference to the bible even though I am not very religious. I do believe that there is a higher power than us out there, just not sure what his or her name is and/or what he or she has sacrificed. I absolutely believe that there are many people who exist in this world. Some are Marthas, some are Marys, and some are a combination of the two ladies. To pin point exactly who we are is not as obvious, and I think it applies to the particular situation as well. For example, if a young couple (a man and a woman) comes together and starts dating, the woman could be more of a Mary. She has no real family responsibilitie yet as a wife or as a mother. If the couple falls in love and decides to get married, it is a good possibility for the woman to start acting more like Martha instead of Mary. This is because Martha is more organized, clean, and orderly. As she goes through her life as a wife and possibly a mother, she has more responsibilities other than herself. Mary is more free, outgoing, and fruitful. I have both Marthas and Marys as professors. I think it is nice to have a variation of the two, instead of just one which would be boring.
The other professor I am taking this semester is a mix of Martha and Mary but he’s a little more in tune with Martha. His answers are exact with what a meaning is and he leads the conversation to where he wants it to go.
ReplyDeleteI find it funny how you mentioned being the cool aunt because I always thought of you to be “the cool aunt”. I’m not sure if you remember in Shakespeare when I first had you as a professor, I approached you after a few classes went by and told you, you had a striking resemblance to my aunt. Tall-ish, thin, same color hair, curly hair, and fun to talk to.
I would love to say that I am as laid back as Mary but unfortunately, during some occasions I feel as though I have to be Martha. If I’m Mary for too long I feel like things just go down the tubes. I haven’t figured out a way where I can remove myself from a situation, so I can be Mary, and not have it go sideways in one way or another. I can only be Mary in someone else’s home because I know no duty or task is required of me.
I never thought to think about teachers as either Martha or Mary in the classroom until this blog post. Truth be told, I am not a very religious or biblical person (more spiritual than anything) but I understand the differences that present itself in the metaphor. To my knowledge, most teachers whom I have come across have been Marthas, which does make sense. They have more to give to us, the students, and want us to learn more about the subject at hand. However, I have met teachers who have been both Martha and Mary, who let us be who we are and express ourselves while also (from time to time) giving us valuable golden nuggets of information that we can use for the rest of our lives.
ReplyDeleteOne current example would be my Drug Use and Abuse professor who utilizes the internet and shows us powerful videos on drug and opioid addiction. She teaches us about drugs and gives us packets filled with information to further expand our knowledge on said topic. She also lets us express ourselves, often asking us for our opinion on the videos and dishing out response/opinion assignments. The class has been rather fulfilling and we have learned a lot because she taught us, but also let us express ourselves and be basked in the sunlight of information.
The representation of Martha and Mary can also exemplify our consciousness -- more specifically, our left/right brains as well as the child vs. the adult. There are certain situations where we have to decide whether to be Martha or Mary. Which is the best possible outcome? I will give a dumb example of middle school students when there is a fight going on. At that age, most students are not fully developed in terms of brain function. I think in that situation, most would say that they would cheer on “fight fight fight” and instigate the brawl. This is the Mary in them (although a little skewed) because they get to enjoy some entertainment and have something to gossip about for a few weeks before something else comes along. They reap the “light” and “benefits” of the fight. However, there are other students at that age (admittedly, me) who will want to immediately get a teacher or supervisor to break up the fight. This is the Martha in me. I don’t like seeing fights and I feel as though I have to protect and take on the adult responsibilities of making sure that no one gets hurt on school grounds.
In short, what I am saying is, we choose whether to be Martha or Mary when a situation presents itself. It is definitely possible for an individual to be both. Sometimes, we have to work hard and sacrifice (Martha) to be able to eventually reap the benefits. Or at least help others to gain the goods as Mary (as evidenced in many immigrant families).